It’s terrifying and depressing when you lose someone, especially if the thought of death has always been on your mind.
When I lost my dad, I wondered to myself, “How long do I have?”
I didn’t know. I still don’t.
When my dad died there were times I asked myself, “What’s the point?” And there were times where it made me want better for myself.
Death has a funny way of making you either change for the better, or change for the worse. I think the situation with my dad brought out both in me.
My depression was a way for me to keep him alive in my memories because I always thought if I became happy, then I “moved on” and he was no longer with me. So sometimes I would make myself depressed because it didn’t feel right to be happy.
Then I realized one day that he would want the best for me. He would want me to be happy.
I think we all do that a lot. When we go through something traumatic, we think we owe it to ourselves to be sad about it. That’s not necessarily true. If in those dark times we can still bring light into the world, that’s true inspiration. The world is always in some type of pain, and if we can learn to smile through ours, to be happy when we want to be and not hold on to that sadness because we think we should be, well then we can change the world.
It took me some time to be happy after my father’s death, but now, I understand that my dad lived his life for me to be happy, and when he died, that intention never changed.
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Bobby Foster uses his powerful poetry to inspire and raise awareness about Cystic Fibrosis. Honoring his father’s memory, Bobby uses his gripping words to encourage people to become the best version of themselves. Be sure to contact him for a free life coaching session, and watch some more of his captivating spoken word poetry.